Monday, 25 June 2012

Goodluck Jonathan a Performance Evaluation of a Joke of a #PresidentialMediachat by Tokdam Dam





I decided to mark the Presidential media chart against some standard criteria for interviews for Jobs and performance evaluation for some organisation. i am however too ashamed to publish the result of the the performance of our dear President. you can do it yourself. here are some of the key criteria: and a few fearful/worrisome responses:

1.In identifying key areas of the economy in which specific progress has been made.


" we are handing the economy in a professional way" , "“I am not in charge of Security, I am not in Charge of Economy, there are people responsible for that”

2.relating answers to questions in key areas;


at 19:55 on Electricity: ”When we were campaiging, we didn’t know that BH will overtake the priorities of government,” in other words , i don tire seff this kind thing seff.
at 20:07 on Agriculture: The president said his government are revolutionizing agriculture in Nigeria.”We are giving cotton seeds free in the North” what about the south, east, and west ?

3.as far as possible record candidates’ responses to questions , did he give direct relevant answers or dance around the questions ? 


20:20 The president says they are managing the economy professionally, “It is not Jonathan that is managing it,” he said, so who did we elect to manage the economy ? 


20:52 Crude Oil Tefth: ”The stealing of crude oil is a Nigerian phenomenon,” the president said. He adds that it has gone cancerous. “We will stop it, but it is like allowing a cancerous cell to grow into a major tumor.” i don't get it, am i daft ?????
20:27 Relationship with National Assembly: ”I have a good relationship with the National assembly,” “Whenever I travel, I go with atleast two members of the National Assembly,” the president reveals. lol, sorry i didn't mean to laugh.

4.objective and consistency :
ON ASSET DECLARATION: “Asset Declaration is voluntary, I don’t give a damn what any one feel about it", how do you fight corruption when you cant tell what people have stolen, one of the rules of public service is that you declare your asset.
On visit to troubled part of the country President Jonathan said he has not visited Borno state, the center of Boko Haram attacks, because the airport there was not functional at the time he planned to visit. “And we did not want to land somewhere and fly in to Maiduguri with a helicopter for obvious reasons.” He promises to visit the state and other states in Nigeria. watin do road, so the roads are so bad you cannot drive to see the people who voted into government. you must fly eh!. 1
9:19 The Brazil Trip: The president said if he hadn’t travelled to Brazil while Kaduna was boiling, it would have sent out a very wrong message to the world, and bolster the sect. so the citizens in shamble and disarray means nothing to the president, he was elected to attend to the international community. if a father runs out of the house when it is on fire with the kids in the house just to attend village meeting so that villagers wont think there is a problem in the house, that is really smart move...
ON HIS INVITATION BY NASS
"Hearing noise in the parliament does not mean that Mr. President and the National Assembly are fighting" this is ops! off point.
ON SECURITY AND ECONOMY
“I am not in charge of Security, I am not in Charge of Economy, there are people responsible for that”
ON HIS ADMINISTRATION
" I told my friends that Nigerians will abuse me till the end of 2012 because they will not see any meaningful development, but they will change and praise me by 2013 because they will begin to see result" sounding very defeated and i don't really care-ish, but this all you can tell us of your administration sir.

ON NIGERIA ECONOMY
"Nigeria is not broke; if we are broke, you wouldn't see investors clamoring to come to Nigeria" investors moving to Ghana is more like it, its good to dream dreams, how many investors are clamouring to come to Nigeria? naming them would have made more sense.
ON CHANGE OF UNILAG NAME
"Most of the top universities in the world are named after people...Harvard and others. The change was made in line with Nigerian laws especially the ones relating to naming and change of name of an institution" yes and OXFORD, YALE, MIT:Massachusetts Institute of Technology ,Yale University,Imperial College London, University of Cambridge, University of Nottingham, named after Mr Oxford, Mr Massachusetts, Mr Cambridge, Mr Nottingham, Mr Imperial, and Mr Yale University.

5. level of participation of audience : out of 160 million Nigerians, the few calls that came through the telephone operator, Governor of Benue state Mr. Suswan; as we heard, many only got to introduce themselves before they were cut off. so less than 0.0001% heard a chance to ask real questions. that is really sad and unfair because if the president continue to hide behind the advice of the wicked people around him he will end up as the worst impression of a president.

Remarks: the candidate(President) performed very poorly and appear fearful, we need to pray for him to find the courage to do the right thing by resigning. it appears somebody (maybe in Brazil) told the President to fire those handling security and talk to Nigerians, he did well to fire the persons he needed to, but as per talking to Nigerians; sincerely we are more fearful for our country after the media chart, the president kept referring to an imaginary person who is suppose to be responsible for the management of the economy, he didn't do anything to assure the citizens of the need to be hopeful, he did very well to increase our fears and worry. he appeared frightful and tired of it all.
conclusion : will you employ candidate to manage the economy of Nigeria ? NEVER, but sadly he is in meant to be the president. but he is not in control what he said, there are people in charge of the economy and security, its not Jonathan, init ?
OK, so moving forward, the next media chart should be more truthful and candidate should prepare to answer questions, enough of the drama.

Video: With Major Crisis in Nigeria: Unilag Students are IDIOTS protesting Change of Name

A White girl Takes on UNILAG Students

Thursday, 21 June 2012

Little Lagos in London. Come and join the discussion at Theatre Local Peckham-London

Little Lagos in London. Come and join the discussion at Theatre Local

As part of Theatre Local 2012 we have programmed a series of FREE panel discussions to take place in the Bussey Building in Peckham during the summer. We thought you might be interested in the first of these discussions Little Lagos in London.

Little Lagos in London

Thursday 21 June, 6.15pm

Join our host BBC journalist Nkem Fijian and an invited panel of writers, academics, actors and activists as they discuss the London Nigerian community.

Panel includes

Bola Agbaje, Playwright (Belong)

Kayode Ogundamisi, journalist, Convener of the Nigeria Liberty Forum, UK

Dr Osita Okagbue, Professor at Goldsmiths University
Ade Solanke, Playwright and Academic

Alice Ukoko, Women of Africa, Human Rights campaigner

FREE! No need to book, just turn up at Theatre Local, The Bussey Building/CLF Art Cafe, 133 Rye Lane, SE15 4ST and join in the debate.

The Bussey Building is opposite Peckham Rye Station
Running time approx 40 minutes

For more deatils on the other talks at Theatre Local visit our website here



Come and see British-Nigerian, Bola Agbaje's new play
Belong at Theatre Local
Until 23 June

Pay-what-you-like on the door on day of performance

Election lost, speeches made and controversy stirred, Kayode - a British MP and self-made man - is hiding. Escaping the political heat in London he flees to Nigeria. But once there, he gets caught up in a whole new power game.

Former Peckham resident, Bola Agbaje's satirical new play questions our notion of home.

**** 'funny, honest and bitingly dark' Times
Indhu Rubasingham directs the 7-strong cast Noma Dumezweni, Jocelyn Jee Esien, Lucian Msamati, Pamela Nomvete, Itoya Osagiede, Richard Pepple and Ashley Zhangazha.

Belong is a Royal Court and Tiata Fahodzi co-production.

Watch the Trailer
Pay-what-you-like on the door on day of performance
Tickets in advance £10 (£8 concs)
BOOK ONLINE | 020 7565 5000

Theatre Local, The Bussey Building/CLF Art Cafe, 133 Rye Lane, SE15 4ST.
The Bussey Building is opposite Peckham Rye Station

Friday, 15 June 2012

GEJ planted cocaine in my house to implicate Timipre Sylva. Richie Tommy Claims

Flash! 'Bag filled with cocaine' found during EFCC house search on Richie Tommy. Brother in-law to former Bayelsa State governor
Timipre Sylva. Family claim the EFCC planted the drugs to implicate Richie Tommy.


Former Bayelsa State governor
Timipre Sylva.

15 June 2012


PRESS STATEMENT

JONATHAN IN FRESH ONSLAUGHT AGAINST SYLVA


In an apparent plot targeted at former Bayelsa State governor, Chief
Timipre Sylva, men of the Economic and Financial Crimes Commission
(EFCC) stormed the Abuja residence of his brother-in-law, Mr. Richie
Imoh Tommy, early Friday morning.

They conducted a thorough search of the house, and when they found
nothing incriminating, they produced a bag which they said contained
cocaine.

On that basis, Mr. Tommy was arrested and has been denied access to his lawyers.

Mr. Tommy completely denies ownership of the said bag, and wonders why
even without a test or investigation, EFCC would claim to have found
cocaine in his house. Besides, it remains curious how EFCC suddenly
became a drug-busting organ.

Mr. Tommy believes that the EFCC assault on his residence and the
allegation of a cocaine-laden bag is another desperate mission
targeted at his in-law, the former Bayelsa State governor, by agents
of President Goodluck Jonathan.


PATRICK UMOH
Personal Assistant to Mr. Richie Tommy

Thursday, 14 June 2012

Obituary: Death of Fuel Subsidy Probe Report. Written by Pius Adesanmi







With heaviness of heart and gratitude to God for a life short lived, we, members of the National Order of Cabalocrats and Sacred Cows of Nigeria, announce the call to glory of our loving Father, Uncle, Husband, Brother, etc, Chief Fuel Subsidy Probe Report, whose sad demise occurred recently in a fatal video accident. 


Although the enemies have done their worst as your death, clearly, is no ordinary eye, we, your family, friends, and political associates, are comforted by our certainty that you have gone to rest in the bosom of the Lord and in the celestial company of other faithfully departed probe reports like the power sector probe report, the Siemens probe report, the Halliburton probe report, and the pension fund probe report . 


We are further comforted by the fact that you will certainly be joined in heaven by the SEC probe report and the Malabu oil probe report as soon as both reports are ready. We love you but God knows better. Sleep well till we meet to part no more.

Survived by:

(1)Family:
Aso Rock (Aged Father)
PDP National Secretariat (Grand Uncle)
National Assembly (Uncle)

(2)Beneficiaries from demise:
Chief Femi Otedola
Oil cartel members too numerous to mention

(3) Soul-for-dollar politicians:
Honourable Farouk Lawan
Honourable Boniface Emenalo

Funeral arrangements as announced by the family.